I didn't have the sense to realize it back then, when I met that girl, how cool and funny she was and wiz when it came to lyrics, but I didn't see her a woman, just a girl, might as well have been another one of the boys.
That night of Saga's Party, she was going to get refreshments and I was heading out to meet my date that night, when she turned to me and confessed her heart to me, but what was it to me?
Nothing special.
"I'm ....seeing someone, I'm sorry but, even if it happened, you just aren't my type."
That's the first time I heard it, someone's heart break. She immidiately looked away from me and remained silent until the elevator door opened. "You have a good night, Shou." was all she said, she got off the elevator and out the back of the lobby.
I didn't think a second time of that incident that night, I brushed it off and met my date that night, as I slept with her however, that broken hearted face came into my mind.
I wanted to appologize to her properly, surely everyone would know about it now, that weekend we all hang out, there's no way they'll let me off easy for it.
But come monday, Seiko and Saga greeted me cheerfully on my way to practice, so did Tomo, Eric and Reike, but Chara....she wasn't there.
"Where's Charlotte?"
"Oh, Haruka took her to San Fransisco, she was sad about something so he wanted to cheer her up."
"O aint love grand?" Saga Chimed in, everyone laughed.
"What do you mean??"
Tomo sighed, "Who would have thought our two black sheep would find eachother? Anyone see that coming, was there a bet?" Everyone laughed as Saga said he saw it coming, and as they all gossiped about it, I understood it, Haruka had been in love with Charlotte this entire time, and he will confess to her in San Fransisco on that beach outside his mother's house, like he said he would when we were kids. I gotten used to ignoring everything except my drinking, and the pretty girls that clung to me at every show and every practice, the next time I saw Chara, she didn't look the same as the shy girl in the elevator. When did her eyes sparkles like embers? Since when did her hair become so shiny and vibrant? Her face even now, I recalled the paleness of her skin and her soft rose colored lips as she greeted me for the first time since I rejected her, a little sad, but happy still, I never noticed that small freckle under her eye, was it always there? I realized it too late, as I watched them arrive together at our show, I knew Haruka would never let her go, and just when I finally saw her, I knew I would never let her go either. I tried my best to love her in silence, we began to have a friendship closer than Haruka expected, I tried my best to hide how I was loving her in silence. So much so that there was a time when I forgot she didnt even see me that way,I would always be the jerk in the elevator who didnt realize I won the lottery, I thought living fast was more important, maybe it was the way my mother raised me, suffocating, but maybe if its her, I would love to lose all air, in hopes that I would have the honor of having her grasp my skin, finally.
Distracted in a daze, i arose from the piano, the rehearsal happened but in between a song I changed the lyrics, about a jerk who couldnt see the loveliest Star until it crashed into another creating a black hole.
I allow once last memory to come back to me as I change som notes on the music sheets, I remember that when we left Los Angeles I asked Haruka if he would miss Charlotte, if they would stay in contact. He said that they talked about it, and he wanted Chara to make the choice herself, if she wanted to be with him, they would find each other again, that he wouldn’t beg her to stay. She told him that she wants to change into a stronger person when they meet up again, but that she’d come find him in Japan when they too had a record deal. She wasn’t lying, I knew it was just a matter of time before they signed them, but only a year after is instance even for a local band there, I wonder how it happened so fast. I should ask her this next time she’s over, with the pages almost done for our new album, I requested Chara be on one of our songs, Haruka is very excited about it as well, but maybe they’ll understand why I always leave the functions early. After all, watching them is like my heart is being through a black hole, someday it will be too much, I wonder if I’ll have something left, I want to move on, but the gravitational pull is just too much for me. I wonder if Ill be crushed under that pressure or by some miracle I could break free.
I know that my feelings can change, I’m working on it, I’m trying my best here, just please, don’t look at me the way you do when we make music, it’s the only face I want to be looking at for the rest of my life.
///What happenes with Haruka and Chara?
Chara is on the stairs crying with the bag of things she was supposed to buy, Haruka is leaving to meet her at the shop to help her since she's taking a while, but when he see's her crying, his heart hurts and he comforts her.
"What's happening, what's wrong Charls?"
He embraces her and she denies anything is wrong, but after he talks to her about how things being bottled up inside can only get worse she tells him.
"I thought that maybe....if someone liked me, they wouldn't mind my looks so much, I know, and don't think I'm being emo or dramatice, but I know I'm not pretty, not sexy, not glamorous like all those girls that chase after him, but we get on so well, I thought that maybe, just maybe he liked me."
"You mean Shou?" he asked sadly.
"Yeah, I don't usually chase after guys because of all those reasons, and others I don't wanna talk about right now, but Shou...makes me feel safe, like I'm home, but now...I feel like I'm locked out forever, and I'm scared, I made things wierd and Shou probably thinks I'm a loser."
"He wont think about that, Chara, you're amazing, don't you see me right here?"
Chara looks at Haruka, her first infatuation, but she recalls that some girl bragged about him.
"I thought you were taken, Anais, told me that you..."
"Sighs... Anaiz is a liar, don't hang out with her... if you only knew what was in my heart...can I show you?"
// what happens to Chara and shou after this Happens.//
Well what happens between them is after Chara and Haruka come back from San Fransisco they grow to be closer friends borderlining going out, but they aren't going out yet, as Haruka hears of Chara's Holidays and he wants her to have a happy memory, he composes a song for her as a present and confession. Shou confronts Chara about her non-chalant attitude towards him and she admits that she thought her would came to a halt, but it really is n big deal, through Haruka's kindness she's found out that it's not the end of the world because Shou and she are such great friends, I just 'need time for us to forget it ever happened, so we can be normal again' to this Shou agrees to it, and they decide they will always be best friends.
After this Shou dotes on Chara, however now he notices that she doesn't many more things With Haruka than they used to, after Christmas however, Shou see's the ring he's given Chara and they moved in, she's only 17 and he's 20, Shou's 21, anyways, he really regrets not accepting Chara's feelings and for the first time in his life he appreciates that someone liked him for himself and not his looks alone. That's when he cant forget her, and never does.
However the L.A. days between Haruka and Chara are memorable.
That night of Saga's Party, she was going to get refreshments and I was heading out to meet my date that night, when she turned to me and confessed her heart to me, but what was it to me?
Nothing special.
"I'm ....seeing someone, I'm sorry but, even if it happened, you just aren't my type."
That's the first time I heard it, someone's heart break. She immidiately looked away from me and remained silent until the elevator door opened. "You have a good night, Shou." was all she said, she got off the elevator and out the back of the lobby.
I didn't think a second time of that incident that night, I brushed it off and met my date that night, as I slept with her however, that broken hearted face came into my mind.
I wanted to appologize to her properly, surely everyone would know about it now, that weekend we all hang out, there's no way they'll let me off easy for it.
But come monday, Seiko and Saga greeted me cheerfully on my way to practice, so did Tomo, Eric and Reike, but Chara....she wasn't there.
"Where's Charlotte?"
"Oh, Haruka took her to San Fransisco, she was sad about something so he wanted to cheer her up."
"O aint love grand?" Saga Chimed in, everyone laughed.
"What do you mean??"
Tomo sighed, "Who would have thought our two black sheep would find eachother? Anyone see that coming, was there a bet?" Everyone laughed as Saga said he saw it coming, and as they all gossiped about it, I understood it, Haruka had been in love with Charlotte this entire time, and he will confess to her in San Fransisco on that beach outside his mother's house, like he said he would when we were kids. I gotten used to ignoring everything except my drinking, and the pretty girls that clung to me at every show and every practice, the next time I saw Chara, she didn't look the same as the shy girl in the elevator. When did her eyes sparkles like embers? Since when did her hair become so shiny and vibrant? Her face even now, I recalled the paleness of her skin and her soft rose colored lips as she greeted me for the first time since I rejected her, a little sad, but happy still, I never noticed that small freckle under her eye, was it always there? I realized it too late, as I watched them arrive together at our show, I knew Haruka would never let her go, and just when I finally saw her, I knew I would never let her go either. I tried my best to love her in silence, we began to have a friendship closer than Haruka expected, I tried my best to hide how I was loving her in silence. So much so that there was a time when I forgot she didnt even see me that way,I would always be the jerk in the elevator who didnt realize I won the lottery, I thought living fast was more important, maybe it was the way my mother raised me, suffocating, but maybe if its her, I would love to lose all air, in hopes that I would have the honor of having her grasp my skin, finally.
Distracted in a daze, i arose from the piano, the rehearsal happened but in between a song I changed the lyrics, about a jerk who couldnt see the loveliest Star until it crashed into another creating a black hole.
I allow once last memory to come back to me as I change som notes on the music sheets, I remember that when we left Los Angeles I asked Haruka if he would miss Charlotte, if they would stay in contact. He said that they talked about it, and he wanted Chara to make the choice herself, if she wanted to be with him, they would find each other again, that he wouldn’t beg her to stay. She told him that she wants to change into a stronger person when they meet up again, but that she’d come find him in Japan when they too had a record deal. She wasn’t lying, I knew it was just a matter of time before they signed them, but only a year after is instance even for a local band there, I wonder how it happened so fast. I should ask her this next time she’s over, with the pages almost done for our new album, I requested Chara be on one of our songs, Haruka is very excited about it as well, but maybe they’ll understand why I always leave the functions early. After all, watching them is like my heart is being through a black hole, someday it will be too much, I wonder if I’ll have something left, I want to move on, but the gravitational pull is just too much for me. I wonder if Ill be crushed under that pressure or by some miracle I could break free.
I know that my feelings can change, I’m working on it, I’m trying my best here, just please, don’t look at me the way you do when we make music, it’s the only face I want to be looking at for the rest of my life.
///What happenes with Haruka and Chara?
Chara is on the stairs crying with the bag of things she was supposed to buy, Haruka is leaving to meet her at the shop to help her since she's taking a while, but when he see's her crying, his heart hurts and he comforts her.
"What's happening, what's wrong Charls?"
He embraces her and she denies anything is wrong, but after he talks to her about how things being bottled up inside can only get worse she tells him.
"I thought that maybe....if someone liked me, they wouldn't mind my looks so much, I know, and don't think I'm being emo or dramatice, but I know I'm not pretty, not sexy, not glamorous like all those girls that chase after him, but we get on so well, I thought that maybe, just maybe he liked me."
"You mean Shou?" he asked sadly.
"Yeah, I don't usually chase after guys because of all those reasons, and others I don't wanna talk about right now, but Shou...makes me feel safe, like I'm home, but now...I feel like I'm locked out forever, and I'm scared, I made things wierd and Shou probably thinks I'm a loser."
"He wont think about that, Chara, you're amazing, don't you see me right here?"
Chara looks at Haruka, her first infatuation, but she recalls that some girl bragged about him.
"I thought you were taken, Anais, told me that you..."
"Sighs... Anaiz is a liar, don't hang out with her... if you only knew what was in my heart...can I show you?"
// what happens to Chara and shou after this Happens.//
Well what happens between them is after Chara and Haruka come back from San Fransisco they grow to be closer friends borderlining going out, but they aren't going out yet, as Haruka hears of Chara's Holidays and he wants her to have a happy memory, he composes a song for her as a present and confession. Shou confronts Chara about her non-chalant attitude towards him and she admits that she thought her would came to a halt, but it really is n big deal, through Haruka's kindness she's found out that it's not the end of the world because Shou and she are such great friends, I just 'need time for us to forget it ever happened, so we can be normal again' to this Shou agrees to it, and they decide they will always be best friends.
After this Shou dotes on Chara, however now he notices that she doesn't many more things With Haruka than they used to, after Christmas however, Shou see's the ring he's given Chara and they moved in, she's only 17 and he's 20, Shou's 21, anyways, he really regrets not accepting Chara's feelings and for the first time in his life he appreciates that someone liked him for himself and not his looks alone. That's when he cant forget her, and never does.
However the L.A. days between Haruka and Chara are memorable.
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